Gooey and Hot Like Honey and Pepper
by orangechicken
Summary: Keroro's latest world domination plot has himself and the rest of his platoon members living their lives as Pekoponians. Using their own anatomy against them in war? it might just work! Or, it'll just create a number of comical situations.   yaoi
1. Chapter 1

**Gooey and Hot Like Honey and Pepper**

**The Ingenious Plot **

"We've been here on Pekopon for some time now, and we haven't used our knowledge of the Pekoponian's body to the fullest yet! Sure they have gear that simulates our skin and gundam suits to cover their feeble pekoponian organs with… but we haven't examined what their actual bodies are capable of!" Slapping the wall with his hand Keroro motioned to a human anatomy chart. "Now the only way we'll be able to fully understand this tool on their bodies is if we become Pekoponians ourselves! Great idea, am I right?"

Giroro was seething and his embarrassment was as visible as the little pink blush marks on his cheeks. He stared at the dangly thing between the anatomy man's thighs. "It's called a reproductive organ you idiot!" Keroro just laughed and said with a mocking tone, "I know, Kururu told me all about them. They have the power to make the Pekoponians do whatever you want." At this Keroro began to snicker.

"Is it really that simple sergeant?" Tamama asked with actual interest. "Why of course Tamama, I've been watching these Pekoponian videos that point to none other. I've been studying them very closely…" Keroro threw a tape to Giroro. "You should study these too Giroro, since you seem the most likely to screw this one up, what with your silly feelings for the Pekoponians and all." Giroro looked down at the cover. A naked Pekoponian man was on top of a naked Pekoponian woman.

"What is this?" Giroro's face was glowing red as he dropped the tape, but Keroro picked it up and slid over to Giroros's side side. "You won't be disappointed, I promise. It'll be good knowledge for when you have to try it out yourself." Giroro froze. 'When I try it out… for myself?' Suddenly, images of Natsumi came to mind, unnecessary images of Natsumi... in a bathing suit. Bet you thought I was going to say naked, didn't you?

Drooling in a corner Giroro stood oblivious to Keroro's triumphant cackling. "And then you can take one of the Pekoponians as your eternal slave!" Keroro crossed his arms and laughed some more. Tamama had an interesting glint in his eyes as well, while Dororo felt he could not participate in such a vulgar mission, and Kururu was nowhere to be seen at the time being.

What an interesting turn of events! Will Keroro actually succeed in creating a human harem? Will Giroro be sucked into this devious and outlandish plot of world domination that will most likely fail miserably and bring up many comical situations and misunderstandings along the way? And really, where the heck is Kururu through all of this? He is the only one who could possibly make this scheme semi plausible. He didn't even appear in the first chapter!

"I didn't feel like it ku ku ku."

All of this, and more to come, in the next chapter of Keroro's Space Harem 2! Okay, I made that one up. But hey, it sounded good didn't it?

つづく


	2. Chapter 2

**Gooey and Hot Like Honey and Pepper**

**The Great weakness**

We last left off at a climactic moment when keroro had just announced a new plot involving the Pekoponians and a way to enslave them through their own anatomy. I wonder how this'll work out for them? The Keronians were gathered around a large computer screen while Kururu at a computer desk, guided the research. "Kururu, load the footage!""Whatever you say, sergeant." Kururu snickered as he pressed a few buttons and a video began to load.

"What you're about to see is some video footage I took at Fuyuki's school. It's both intriguing and horrifying at the same time…" The screen was black, and then suddenly something large and blurry appeared. Something round and white with a black circle in it appeared. The round black thing began to move, and suddenly a shudder ran up everyone's back. Everyone stared intently at the screen as the image slowly came into focus. "What is that?" Tamama asked with the unmasked horror in his voice as he clung to Giroro's arm. "That's not… what it looks like down there for them is it?" "Aw, this has got to be gross!" Giroro yelled along with Tamama.

Then, keroro hopped up suddenly and waved his arms apologetically. "Wait! Wait! Sit down! I forgot I was holding the camera the wrong way for about ten minutes into the footage." Suddenly everyone was staring at Keroro's eye on the screen, and on the video footage they could hear Keroro's voice muttering that the recorder must be broken. Giroro and Tamama probably didn't believe that their dear beloved leader could reach a new level of idiocy, but little did they know. "Those Pekoponian recorders are so primitive!" Keroro defended himself with a huff and nodded his head in agreement to his own statement with crossed arms. Kururu snickered. "You were using a Keronian video recorder."

So after ten minutes of the sergeants large out of focus eye, everyone was able to recognize the setting in the footage as one of Fuyuki's classrooms. "Here it is, the golden moment that we've all been waiting for!" The teacher popped in a cassette tape and turned out the lights in the room. The footage suddenly zoomed into to the video that all the teens were starring wide eyed at. "This is the very informative video that all Pekoponians are introduced to at this age." "They have to watch an informative video over their own reproductive organs?" Giroro asked clearly confused. "Exactly, Giroro! Now, why would Pekoponians need to watch an informative video over their own reproductive organs unless… there was something to it."

The video footage eventually turned off and Keroro suddenly looked grave. "The truth is, this is the Pekoponians' ultimate weakness. The video is meant to terrify the small Pekoponians into never reproducing, as it can only lead to decreased intelligence and an uncontrollable desire to reproduce! Oh, and let's not forget the little plastic tube. Oh, if it isn't an ingenious little device." "What's the plastic tube for sir…?" Tamama quietly asked and everyone stared at Keroro with expecting eyes. "In case the Pekoponians have the inevitable need to reproduce, then the male in the species must wear this tube in order to lessen the chance of wanting to reproduce again and to help decrease chances of IQ loss."

"It's too horrible! I don't want to be a Pekoponian now! You can't make me!" Tamama clung tighter to Giroro, who didn't respond in return, due to the sudden culture shock he'd just experienced. "You'll serve your world and become a Pekoponian whether you like it or not private second class Tamama! Now sit down and take a look at these statistics." Tamama reverted to sniffling, but plopped down and listened nonetheless.

"Judging by these statistics Pekoponians are nearly enslaved by their own reproductive organs." "How does this even make sense?" Giroro asked, finally coming out of his culture shock. "I don't know, but needless to say, the Google results are… astronomical. I have asked sergeant major Kururu to prepare us a device that will allow us a chance to live as Pekoponians." At the mention of becoming a Pekoponian Tamama began to cry. "Isn't this rushing things a bit sergeant?" Giroro asked but Keroro waved the comment aside. "We are elite warriors, and it's about time we've started acting like warriors! There are three things warriors have… and though I can't really remember those three things right now, I'm sure they'd inspire you to recklessly become a Pekoponian without any prior knowledge to living as one if I could remember them."

After that, a quick game of rock, paper, scissors decided the fate of private Second Class Tamama to be the first Keronian ever to become a Pekoponian in the existence of space history, and so the second chapter ends.

つづく


End file.
